Sticki Picki

Yesterday Ryan and I ate dinner with his parents then decided to go fulfill my craving for a nutella and banana crepe. I got the crepe and we also got suckered into this...


"Hey death, I'm a fucking mess. Can you stop this beating in my chest?"

On July 1st, I experienced the feeling of impending death for the first time in my life due to my heart problems. I woke up in my room at 430am, thought I was going to throw up and it turned into 3 minutes of me feeling literally like I was dying. There was a moment in all of it where I stopped begging and praying for it to stop and instead prayed for me to just pass out and pass on, if that's what was going to happen. I was alone, I couldn't get to my phone and I was a complete mess. I collapsed every time I stood up, I lost consciousness, I smacked my face on something and I felt like I couldn't breath. I was disoriented. Luckily, it all stopped after miraculously making it from my bathroom to my kitchen (knocking over chairs and running into doors on the way) where I threw ice on my face and neck (after passing out when I first got to the kitchen) and I returned to my normal self. Needless to say, I immediately made an appointment with my cardiologist. I saw him on Thursday and he said that what I experienced was true vasovagal syndrome aka neurocardiogenc syncope and that it probably won't be the last time I go through that.

We kept talking and I told him what happened with me passing out at work, while sitting in a chair, in January. He is really worried about that, more so than anything else. SO doctor's orders:

Wear the heart monitor again, this time on a day that I work

Do a tilt table test

And then perhaps a neurologist consult, because he's genuinely worried that what happened at work was a seizure...

I also wouldn't mind a referral to an electrophysiologist. Perhaps they could take a closer look at the electrical conduction pathways in my heart and find a solution.

Maybe I need a life alert system?